June 22, 2008 Update

6/22/08
So I had the fitting on Friday, not too bad.My first radiation treatment is Wednesday at 4pm. I will have to do 25 sessions (5 days a week for 5 weeks basically). I will only be in the machine for 10 minutes a day. Based on my observation Friday they seem to have it down to an art form so no waiting or anything like that. I get to come through a special back door with a valet to park for me, walk right in, and wait less than 5 minutes before they get me for my session.

I actually felt like a real person this weekend. I went to a co-worker's BBQ and spent all day Saturday just laughing. It was awesome. But they had a pool, I keep getting tempted by the pool!!! I was good, basically b/c I just can't have my co-workers seeing my thighs but alas it is on my no-no list. Yet I confess, I did cave today. I should move apartments so I don't have to watch kids people swimming all day but it is too late. I said I was just going to get some sun. Vitamin D is very important after all. And After this week I will not able to be in direct sun for the rest of the summer with radiation so, I had to take advantage of it, right. And then, all the brats left and no one was at the pool.....and I went in. Just for a few minutes. I used the same rational with myself I used for my sushi failure a few weeks ago...I've lived through brain surgery, chemo, who knows how many hurricanes.....if I'm due to die from some pool bacteria, so be it. Then alas a whole family invaded, complete with grandma, sisters and her kids, blahhhhh, I was outta there. But it felt good!!!

So now I am ready for my sunless summer. I have never been a sun person until I had to face the fact that I would not be allowed in the sun all summer. So odd. So enjoy your summer heat for me this yr and remember, if it were taken away and you had to be locked in buildings with no choice all summer, you'd miss it.

Radiation side effects (I like to pre-answer questions I know you have) - I will loose all my hair, she said that question she can answer for sure. I will be tired but to what degree that varies from person to person so she can't answer. Being so young places things in my favor, being immediately after brain surgery and chemo goes against me, so who knows. The biggest concern is one I did not even know of. By doing whole brain radiation my pituitary gland will most likely be impacted. By the intern's words I am doing "mass doses" of radiation. What does that mean? The pituitary gland controls the thyroid so it could stop working which would result in me either taking meds for that or even possible thyroid removal....yeah, more scars, I already have more lines on me that Rand McNally, oh well. I told my Dr if I get the thyroid problem that makes me too skinny I would not be seeking treatment but with my luck, who are we kidding, I'll get the thyroid problem that puts on weight and pack back on my pre-chemo pounds. Oh well, we'll cross that bridge later I guess. My sisters should be very proud, I told the WHOLE ugly truth in that paragraph of possible concerns.

Programming note - On Sept. 5 all of the major networks will simulcast a charity event for cancer research. This organization and event were founded by Katie Couric, as you may or may not know she has lost both her husband and sister to cancer and has done mountains for research over the past decade as a result of those horrible losses. The website for more information is www.standup2cancer.org I have a "team" established there if you would like to join for support, solidarity, whatever. No donations required to join. Anyway, the name if you want to join is "In all things give thanks".

I never thought I'd truly give thanks for cancer, but I do, it has forever changed me and as a result my view, my impact, my core self. For every blessing he pours out, I will turn back to praise.

Ok dear ones, that's all I have for now.

God bless and keep you.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
~Jeremiah 29:11